RAD technical rider

This contract rider includes specifications on stage design, sound systems, lighting rigs, podium heights and styles.  It is also a wish list -- from transportation and billing to dressing room accommodations and meals.  All of this is required to make Russell A. Dale happy. 

Please do your best when trying to provide this extensive list of necessary items.  In some cases, a promoter will refuse a demand (crossing out the request on the document), and can be done.  It is, however, not recommended.

To save time and to be totally clear, please do not amend or change this rider for return.  Instead, grab a separate piece of paper and thoroughly describe you objections or concerns and fax a copy for review to a representative of Mr. Dale.

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SECTION 1

ARTIST COMPOUND
Barricade
Stage

SECTION 2

PRODUCTION OFFICE AND DRESSING ROOMS

Russ Dale’s dressing room will have:

1 large white toga
1 18 1/2" x 13 5/8" stainless steel serving tray with domed lid (large enough to hold a huge turkey)
1 massive lizard (water Monitor, Varanus salvatori)
6 pair surgical gloves
1 closed circuit television camera (with complete building broadcast capability)
5 apple pie scented candles
2 63-inch PPM63H1, Samsung Plasma display televisions
1 Sony DVX-100, 10-Disc Blu-ray/CD Changer
7 Pioneer PDSP-1, 5.1-channel surround sound speakers (with 254 circular speakers built into one flat Godless panel!)
1 Sony Playstation 4 with 4 controllers and memory card
100 rated M for Mature Playstation 4 video games
1 Smoker Cooker Bar-B.Q. Grill model #84 Mobile
Wifi access

Support Staff dressing rooms will have:

STILL TO BE DETERMINED

SECTION 3

FOOD AND BEVERAGE STUFFS

1 gallon top shelf buttermilk
10 pounds of lean Austrian pot roast
2 fresh vegetable trays with Freedom onion dip (cauliflower, broccoli, carrots, celery, cucumbers, cilantro and cherry tomatoes)
24 slabs of pork ribs
40 chicken quarters
16 chicken breasts
48 Boulder Beer bratwurst
1 package of hot dogs
1 big hunk of bologna
1 whole roasting pig
3 large roasting turkeys
2 bulky hams
10 marinated salmon (with Mango-Chile Sauce)
100 bottles of bottled water (room temperature and not Evian!)

ALCOHOL REQUIREMENTS

1 keg fresh Denver Beer Co Graham Cracker Porter (mixed gases, keg coupler, faucet and keg fridge provided by Mr. Dale's management)
12 frosted gray 16-ounce pint glasses with American Flag logo
2 1-liter bottles of JÄGERMEISTER (colder-than-ice at 4ºF please)
12 NASA “meatball” logo shot glasses
4 bottles of 1951 vintage Grange Hermitage (Penfolds Grange) red wine
4 six packs of Samuel Adams Cream Stout (bottled, full-bodied, coffee-like, heavily roasted, sweet finish with creamy head)
4 six packs of H.C. Berger Chocolate Stout (bottled)
1 liter Everclear (95% pure grain alcohol.  190 proof)

SECTION 4

WASHROOM FACILITIES

The bathroom should be cleanly with traditional toilet, “squat” toilet, bidet hygienic irrigator (THE BIDET IS A MUST HAVE!  This offers Mr. Dale and his guests a natural hands-off and soothing water wash in place of the irritating wiping action of toilette paper), double vanity sink and shower facilities with American Flag shower curtain. 

7 White bath towels with a red, white and blue stripe DOWN THE MIDDLE
3 Rolls of sky blue toilette tissue (Charmin Ultra)
1 Box of vanilla flavoured Dolly Madison Bakery Zingers cream filled cakes (with see-through wrapper so the golden cakes can be seen nestled sweetly inside, gleaming brilliantly like a meteor as it "zings" through the night sky)
2 15-gram packages of Original Satya Sai Baba Nag Champa incense
1 vanilla 3.5-ounce spray Ozium Deodorizer

Footers Catering - Denver

Was there as a Yelp Elite. It was a 'Cater and Compete" event.

Footers Catering has it where it counts. Since 1981, Footers has catered countless events with great quality and service.

After a visit to Footers, to see them in action, I was struck by the culture around the business. It was exceptional! It was fun! The employees, including owner Anthony Lambatos, were knowledgeable, friendly and way beyond helpful.

The facility was clean, beautiful and expansive. The "Awesomeness" room had a popcorn machine, basketball and ping pong action.

And the food: uniquely delicious.

From the vanilla maple glazed sweet potato fries with bacon salt to campfire bites (a great take on s'mores) to cheesecake lollipops to Dr. Pepper braised beef short rib sliders to a mac & cheese station with delicious toppings like spicy buffalo chicken nuggets, crumbled bacon, fried onions, diced tomatoes and more, the menu left me stuffed beyond capacity. Each item was carefully prepared and the quality showed in both appearance and taste.

Add in Hors d'Oeuvres of bacon wrapped dates stuffed with smoked almond and bleu cheese, some salmon and goat cheese appetizer deliciousness, and it all made for a more than impressive meal.

When in need of catering services in the Denver area I will, forevermore, go to Footers Catering for all of my needs. Try them out. You'll be glad you did!

Star Wars Comic Books

I am loving on Marvel's new Star Wars comic books. They are canon. They are good!

Taco House rules

I have been going to Taco House for over 30 years.  I believe the store on Littleton Boulevard in Littleton, Colorado is the best out of all of them.  I travel quite the distance for the meal.  They have good food, friendly staff and a homey atmosphere.  The prices are reasonably priced.  The menu is filled with a large array of foodie goodness.  Taco House has been in the Denver Metro Area for over 50 years. 

I come from the old school "All You Can Eat," so I've had my fair share of this "Colorado Mex" over the years.  I get the same thing every time.  I even take my mother there for Mother's Day.  My whole family loves the Taco House.  Many forsake it.  I think those forsakers are crazy and wrong.

Support local businesses and give Taco House a try.  You'll be glad you did.

Laughter

Makes me laugh.

Valentine's Day Horror

'Tis time now to retell the classic elementary school Valentine’s Day horror show of my youth:

In elementary school, as my classmates were distributing their Valentines into the creatively festive and decorated shoe boxes with the little slot at the top, I was full of activity handing out my own Transformers Valentines crammed with candies and cookies and treats and trinkets abound.  I took pride and meticulous care putting each Valentine into the appropriate students box.  I made, with youngster pride, a special Optimus Prime Valentine, the Transformer leader of the Autobots, for little Sally, a classmate with whom I had a tiny elementary school crush.  I wrote her pure poetry in grade school scrawl.  She would scoff at my shy smiles.  We spent countless hours playing MASH (Mansion, Apartment, Shack, House) during journal time. 

Our special school-day party beginning, everyone sat proudly at their desks and we were instructed to open our shoeboxes and begin reading our Valentines.  The paper was flying and there were squeals of delight all around me, candy wrappers buzzing.  The clamoring in the room was deafening.  I tore my lid open to find one Valentine.  My blood froze and my under-developed mind could hardly process the smack down I had received. 

"Only one," I questioned aloud, a defeated whisper really, tears welling in my eyes.  But there were over thirty kids in my class!  Could this hefty card be from wee Sally?  I wonder what words of devotion she scrawled on the card?  IMy hands trembled in anticipation as I slashed it open, tossing the envelope over my head, to reveal a Valentine from my teacher Mrs. H. 

My peers had shafted me.  I was the fat little nerd who didn't deserve any Valentines.  I was the kid who had to wear the eye patch because of a lazy eye.  I was the poor one who ate string cheese at snack-time.  I can still hear their hateful snickering.  At least nobody put boogers on the back of my shirt like they did with filthy Mandy what’s her name!

I was made fun of mercilessly because of the eye patch.  Comments like, "Hee hee you're a pirate," as I was being kicked down the stairs and "It's Valentine's Day not Halloween, why are you wearing an eye patch fatty?" as I was being shoved to the pebbly ground in the play area and "Fat boy, you're such a geek for wearing an eye patch," asshole classmate Rudolph would say, "You don't need this burger," as he took the cheeseburger from my lunch tray and shoved it into his filthy gob.  I remember more than one lunch consisting of just mustard and a spoon. 

The pointing and laughter didn't help me adjust to the eye patch.  It only made me withdraw even more into my fantasy world in which I was lord and ruler.  My teachers would try to help me in my grief, but
they only made it worse with accidental comments, "Yes One-Eyed Russie, the answer to number 12 is 387.  Good for you pirate Bloody Russell Rackham.  You get a silver sticker star and a piece of Valentine's chocolate. Arg!"

It was mandatory that everyone got a Valentine but I didn't raise a ruckus when I got only one.  Perhaps my name was unintentionally left off the list.  I smiled through it all although inside I was brimming with suffering and torment.  Disappointed and ready to nap away my pain, my little tears soaking my custom pillowcases, it was time to beat the piñata.  I was looking forward to shoving and battling for candy.  My right!

John Paul was the brute of our class, but I was chosen as the first to try my hand at the piñata.  Blindfolded awkwardly, my to-tight hand-me-down t-shirt showing my belly embarrassingly, I used the baseball bat to swing aimlessly at the papier-mâché Pound Puppies monstrosity hanging from the asbestos ceiling tiles.  "I will now get revenge for the insult brought upon me this day," said I as my 3rd-grade mind reeled and dreamt of sweet candy falling from the air.  Taking my Valentine's Day feelings and frustrations out on the piñata, I spilt it open with a fury on the third swing.  I was alive.  Power surged through me.  Cheers echoed in the hallways.  I had gashed open the piñata like a true sportsman.  Gone were the days when I struck out in Tee Ball.  Now I could revel in the candy treats like I deserved.

I felt a rush of air.  I heard a mob of gleeful youth dive.  I felt them pushing me out of the way, my knees bending in unnatural ways, my pants splitting in the crotch.  There is nothing more sickeningly grubby than a frisk of kids scrambling for candy.

By the time I removed the blindfold and looked at the ground, all that was left was an unwrapped Tootsie Roll, a rubber band and the mangled head of Cooler the Pound Puppy piñata.  I still hear the lips of my filthy peers smacking as they shoved the candy into their greasy, ungrateful mouths, pushing me aside violently to get back to their desks.  I was beaten, my child soul stripped away without a second thought. 

Just when I thought things couldn't get any worse, "Russie," screamed my twin sister, smiling uncontrollably as she entered the classroom.  She was overburdened with her Valentine shoebox overflowing with goodies and presents and electronics from all of her little boyfriends and pals.  Her hair was mussed and she had cupcake mess smeared all over her face and a separate basket filled with other lavish gifties and a new plasticy backpack crammed with stuffed animals and treasures and stickers and cookies.

I showed her my empty box and the rubber band in shame and she felt sorry for me.  She shared her loot with me, handing me a cupcake with sweet pink frosting.  We skipped home singing and laughing, which was a departure because usually bullies chased me home. 

Thankfully Valentine's Day was over for another year.

the Star Wars

I am a born and raised Star Wars fan. I saw the original in 1977 at the age of 1 1/2 at the East drive-in theater in Pueblo, Colorado.

I grew up playing with the action figures. I grew up watching each episode come out in theaters. I’ve camped outside movie theaters to get tickets to the re-release special editions of the original trilogy. I’ve seen the prequel trilogy with friends and family, all of us gathering to see the continuation of events in a galaxy far, far away. I like the prequel trilogy. It’s all “Star Wars” in my opinion.

I am hot for the new canon. I’ve seen the Clone Wars cartoon, am currently watching Rebels, have read the new canon novels “Tarkin” and “New Dawn.” I’m gobbling up the innovative Marvel comics.

All of this is leads up to December of this year when “Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens” hits theaters. I believe this will be the biggest motion picture event of all time. It will bring magic back to the movie theater. It will be an awesome time. I can’t wait.